Elder couple passes by speaking Cantonese.
She pushes him slightly from behind
while he moves ahead
with the urgency of her,
the urgency of a lifetime,
as if he has never been
quite where she wants him to be,
always somewhere behind,
always lacking a little,
and not quite right.
The dreams of a woman too often
must find their fullness in a man.
He has come to accept the pain of it
and now feels strangely lightened
because she bears the burden
of his inadequacy.
It frees him to find peace inside himself.
The push of her now harbors the stamp
of an intimacy with himself,
a level of self-acceptance
he may never have achieved
on his own.
And she puts the disappointment
of all her dreams and desires into him,
now bearable because she still loves him.
I am contented watching them
because I feel their contentment,
beneath the jagged surface,
as if they have, at last,
I often imagine what life a stranger might have lived based on observation: how the person moves or talks or from some interaction with others. I've written a series of poems in a set I call "Lives" based on these observations. You can read more in the series by clicking here of in the tag below.
© Nick LeForce
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Larry Dillenbeck and I will be hosting a webversation, a webinar-conversation, about relationships: Love From The Inside Out on Thursday, August 2, 2018 at 7:00 PM. It's free and without any sales pitch. We're just to curious guys wanting to explore interesting topics. Come join the conversation!
For more info and to register, click here.
Any couple that has been together for decades has endured difficult times and has likely had to come to terms with (or at least learned to tolerate) failed expectations, behavioral irritants, and percieved personality flaws. When this happens, it represents another stage of love, a stage that is only achieved over time and through the deep knowing that you and your partner will be together no matter what. This knowing is different than, and beyond, the commitment to be together. It is a fact. And with it, there is often a kind of spiritual "surrender." It is not a "deeper" love so much as a wider love, a widening embrace of the whole of oneself and one's partner.